The world of social media, dating web sites and reality television took the simple art of dating and romance and flipped it on its ear. Single men and women around the globe seem at a crossroads of confusion, not sure exactly who or what to listen to or believe anymore.
The notion of simply meeting someone casually or through friends seems like ancient history when compared to the likes of Match.com, the wondrous world of Facebook and, of course, everything from the "Bachelor" or "Bachelorette" to the lesser known but equally farcical "Alaskan Women Looking for Love."
Those shows showcase entertainment underscored with a dating and romantic theme but are hardly reality. What does the average person do when looking for love? For starters, the "looking" should be in all the right places.
Dating web sites sit atop the list of the most trusted forms of communication and meeting as far as being credible and somewhat successful by nature. The ads for Match.com or eHarmony.com, the biggest players in this lucrative marketplace of online dating, promise everything from happiness to finding your soul mate. These web sites take an analytical approach to love, hardly a romantic outlook but a route that lovestruck men and women have no choice but to take. Often the abundance of criteria needed to establish an online dating portfolio feels more like "Moneyball"and fielding a baseball team with nothing but statistics instead of "Match Game," when just a few questions should do the trick.
The key to online dating that takes it from conventional to catalyst is honesty in your profile and not adhering to what sounds sexy or sensational. Typical wisdom for women, as an example, tells them to play hard to get or shy away from their single status. The truth is that lifestyle isn't anything to be ashamed of and should be embraced.
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A huge advocate of that advice is Mandy Hale
, who has become a pioneer via social media as far as love and dating advice and is an equally renowned author on the subject. She's experienced the trials and tribulations of relationships and love gone bad and her latest book, "The Single Woman: Life, Love and a Dash of Sass," ensures women that truthfulness, honesty and embracing their single status is nothing to shy away from, too. If you can't find love, in essence, don't compromise your single status for a relationship that isn't what you want.
The same could be said for fellow author and relationship connoisseur Rachel Khona
, who delves into the idea that women are independent and shouldn't be given a stereotypical label as "money-hungry" or only interested in a "free ride." She's penned some perfect examples with such stellar best sellers as "Guys We Don't Want Your Money: We Want to be Courted" or "What Men Really Want: For Ladies to Pay on the Date Too."
Online dating and the glitz and glamor of dating via reality TV do not mesh well or go hand in hand with anything Khona endorses, but rather the opposite: women, and men for that matter, only see topical, tantalizing traits. The unrealistic view of blind dating via the Bachelor as an example places an unrealistic result to dating as a whole. Take the overly campy, aforementioned "Alaskan" premise as grounds for gaudy. Being swooned by a plethora of men and filling each day with ridiculously unattainable adventure isn't the typical first and subsequent dates. Television amps up dating and puts the average man or woman in a position to attempt to live up to the misgivings being perpetuated on television. Why do you think you see fake photos on social media or networking sites or, for that matter, photos that wouldn't be deemed as appropriate for the general public?
Brands like Astroglide and others give consumers and the dating community as a whole plenty of advice before you actually begin building a profile. Heeding their helpful words would go a long way to cultivating a realistic relationship even when everything around you from a dating perspective is as unreal as possible. Believe it or not, television hasn't taken everyone looking for a relationship to task and believing in relationships predicated on truthful, realistic factors still exist and are "out there."
Rob Hill Sr. recently released "I Got You: Restoring Confidence in Love Relationships" on Sept. 17 and in it he gives a no-nonsense approach to love and relationships that is devoid of the games and deception you may find in the imaginary world of dating.
That type of sensible, no-nonsense candor and demeanor, coupled with enough wherewithal, confidence in who you are at the present time, is exactly the kind of proverbial kick in the pants dating desperately needs.
What is doesn't need is more pseudo reality television that upholds and preserves petty behavior and a putrid outlook on something that is as valued and pure as potential, budding relationships.
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