08/25/14 by Chasity McLeod
You've been waiting for your favorite band to come to town. You bought your tickets months in advance.
Finally, the day of the show arrives.
The weather is perfect.
The atmosphere is electric at the venue, and you think this is going to be a great night. Until you run into these people
1. One More Beer Guy: He's probably been drinking since yesterday, and he can barely stand up when the opening act takes the stage. He's stumbling and bumping into everyone, making sure to spill a little bit of his drink onto anyone in his path. But you know he's going to have another one, and another after that.
He probably won't remember the concert. And there's a good chance he may wake up in the ICU getting his stomach pumped. But the thought of his suffering won't make up for the suffering you'll endure if you're stuck next to this guy at the concert you've been waiting for.
2. The Make Out Couple: Everybody loves a slow song when they're at a concert with their significant other. It's a chance to wrap your arms around each other, maybe dance slowly together while the live music plays. And of course share a kiss while the band plays "your song." All of that is all well and good, but then there's the "Make Out Couple."
Being near this couple at a concert gives you the pleasure to view lots of sloppy kissing and some awful form of dancing. It doesn't matter what kind of music your favorite band is playing, it won't sound nearly as sweet if you're stuck next to the Make Out Couple.
3. Mr. Mosh Pit: This is One More Beer Guy and then some. And it doesn't matter if it's folk music show, this guy wants to thrash. Mr. Mosh Pit can usually be identified by his angry facial expressions, and he also will be bouncing around like he's in the octagon during a fighters intro for a UFC match. Mr. Mosh Pit is easily identifiable by his wardrobe, usually something by Affliction, or a tank top with some type of dragon pattern or camo print. If you want your good time at a concert ruined, Mr. Mosh Pit is your man.
4. The Music History Lesson: He was in London for the Beatles in the 60s. At MSG for the Stones in the 70s. He saw "The Boss" at least once every year in the 80's. And tonight, he's sitting next to you.
He'll tell you all about those shows, which he may not even have actually went to, or he'll tell you why music was better "back in the day."
Sure you came to actually hear your favorite band play live, but tonight you'll miss half of your favorite song because you're getting a Music History Lesson instead.
5. What's That Smell Guy: He may have paid $35 for the concert T shirt, but he must not have had $1.99 for a stick of deodorant. WTS Guy is usually sweating profusely, and he also comes in a variety of awful scents. Nothing takes the air out of your event (and out of your lungs) quite like being stuck next to What's That Smell Guy.
You've probably encountered one or more of these people. If you're attending a concert in the near future, you're probably hoping that you don't encounter any of them, much less one.
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